***I know this is not standard show note format and the episode is 5 days late but I will update this with all the bells and whistles once I get a chance. Full transcript below.***
Mom: Angelica, can you say hello?
Angelica: Hello! Hello?
Mom: How are you today?
Angelica: I doing well…how are you?
Mom: Well I’m doing well also. (she laughs)
Welcome to MFA: The Parenting Edition, I’m Taisha Cameron. These lessons from the theatre for raising ourselves and our kids came about when I realized my MFA in acting trained me for life as a mommy better than life as a full-time actor. Today’s episode explores social justice and the value of a human life. We’ll explore some challenging questions, I’ll share some stories, and then we’ll end our episode with the Raise a Glass Series. So, without further ado, this is MFA.
“It’s just too difficult to be alive, isn’t it, and try to function? There are all these people to deal with.” ~ from Christopher Durang’s Laughing Wild
Episode Thirteen – It’s Socially Complicated
Question – How do we create change? Can theatre be used as a vehicle for social change? What are the social issues we feel are important and worth speaking out about? Why? What does the world look like that we long to live in? How does that world look, not only for our lives but, for those who are less fortunate than us? What does liberty, freedom, respect, equality, look like in your mind?
There are tons of plays out there that address social injustices and inequalities that people around the world face and I’ll leave a bunch of them in the show notes. But there’s, also, other branches of theatre that work most directly with those issues and the people directly affected by them.
Pedagogy
I’ll be honest, I had no idea what this word meant. Or that it was a word. I mean, I’m sure I came in contact with it at some point in my life but I clearly never took the time to learn what it meant. So, for those out there like me, our new word for today is pedagogy and I’m pronouncing it that way because that seems to be the most consistent pronunciation that I have found. It’s the method and practice of teaching. There is another term called critical pedagogy which is the philosophy of education and social movement. This concept originated with the educator Paulo Freire in Brazil during the 60’s. According to Wikipedia, “the goal of critical pedagogy is the emancipation of the oppressed through an awakening of the critical consciousness (which focuses on achieving an in-depth understanding of the world, allowing for the perception and exposure of social and political contradictions. Critical consciousness also includes taking action against the oppressive elements in one's life that are illuminated by that understanding).” Paulo Freire is the influence behind Augusto Boal’s Theatre of the Oppressed. Now we’ve slid to a new term, theatre pedagogy. Its root is connected with social awareness like critical pedagogy but utilizes the techniques of the theatre for this purpose. That is the foundation of Theatre of the Oppressed. I have not studied this form of theatre so what I’m throwing out to you is info I’ve gathered through the good old interweb. I’ll leave some links in the show notes as always for you to geek out on for research and inspiration. The simplest way to describe Theatre of the Oppressed is a creatively empowering space for individuals and communities to explore the oppressive forces most prevalent in their lives and practice ways they can come up with solutions on how to respond and react to those circumstances when encountered again in the outside world. It allows participants the opportunity to both create and practice executing constructive ways to resist oppression. Another form of this work is seen in drama therapy. Yes, drama therapy exists. After I finished my masters, I actually looked into going back to school (that would’ve been a dumb idea) but going back to school to get trained as a drama therapist. Obviously, I didn’t but I considered it. The following is from the North American Drama Therapy Association website,
Drama therapy is beneficial for individuals, families, and communities struggling with transition, loss, social stigmatization, isolation, and conflict. It is an effective option for the treatment and prevention of anxiety, depression, and addiction, among other conditions. Drama therapy can promote positive changes in mood, insight, and empathy, and it can facilitate healthy relationships.
Throughout this podcast, what I’ve been promoting is the use of theatre to help promote healthy changes in our lives. I feel like I’ve been a little drama therapist myself, but I’M NOT so don’t take anything that I said seriously because legally I am not giving you this information for direct therapeutic purposes…I’ve said that…so. Now, all of these methods help effect change in a person and community. In the world kids fall under the category of most vulnerable, with the least rights, and most susceptible to oppression and abuse from the nation their born into to their own parents.
Why do we have kids?
In episode one we talked choices. The choice to become parents and artists or whatever life we’ve chosen for ourselves. It basically was a look inward towards the truth of why we chose the path we’re on. This question is about our choice to expand society. What is the fundamental purpose for birthing another human? We’re approaching 8 billion people in the world. Why?
Ok, here, here in the US, we have a capitalist society so our purpose as citizens of this country is to keep the system going so, we’re born to be consumers. That’s the point of having kids as an American, that’s how we help our country and give to our country. The possibility of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness is there and should be our birthright but even that doesn’t extend to everyone. When you look at all the social issues that people of this country (and the world) fight for they all boil down to everyone wanting to be respected and not be oppressed. That’s the whole reason for the Declaration of Independence, which is when you think about it a really radical act – to emancipate yourself from another, to buck the system and get out from under the oppressive thumb of the British monarchy. And it worked. They, in my grossly oversimplified telling, wrote out their list of grievances and said “Fuck you! We’re done!” The feeling from these elite, educated, white men with money was a small sense of the oppression that women, the slaves they owned and others throughout history have felt and they said ‘No thank you, I’ll pass, we’re breaking up with you Britain cause you’re batshit crazy it’s definitely you and not me.’ Our society was founded on the desire to not be oppressed. Yet we still have battles about social issues that oppress the unalienable rights of our own people.
Now what are these issues?
What are the social issues that are on people’s minds? Well, we’re in an election year, so EVERYTHING seems to be of dire importance. Some heated topics for folks are Voting Rights, Climate Change, Healthcare, Immigration, Racial Injustice, Income Gap, Gun Violence, Hunger and Food Insecurity, Gender Inequality, Homelessness, Abortion, Education Laws, Labor Laws, and this is by no means the end of the list. I’m all for humanity operating from a place of authentic altruism but when it comes to voting and social justice issues are we really that concerned about others? Aren’t we all gonna vote to protect our own ass? Aren’t we all a little bit…selfish? Aren’t we all a little bit selfish sometimes? And that just helps those committing hate crimes. We teach our children the world is great but we also teach them it’s fine to hate, but things are fine if you’re rich and you’re white, this world if fucking crazy you know I’m right. Most of us don’t give a shit what happens to other people. We don’t. We say it’s not our problem, it sucks to be them. We judge or ridicule. We pray that we never end up like them (and we all have our on ideas of who the “them” refers to). Some people even wish others to die to rid the world of their existence, “and decrease the surplus population.” And a bah-humbug to you too. It makes me wonder than what is the value of a human life? Who gets to pursue happiness and who doesn’t? Who is allowed the freedom to live their authentic lives and who’s not afforded the freedom to live?
Children are the most vulnerable population on earth, right? I was reading the US Constitution because well, sometimes you have to do it for work (like a podcast episode you’re working on) and the beginning of it says (for those who’ve never read it):
We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, ensure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.
The part about secure the blessings of liberty to ourselves and our posterity made me think of the world my 3-year-old daughter is being raised in; how our actions and inactions will affect her and her children. There’s a mountain of social issues our country dabbles in addressing and I wonder if we’ll ever get to a place of making a successful lasting change in one or more of them.
*Angelica Interlude
Mom: Try it again
Angelica: (grunting) I need help…ing.
Mom: I have been helping you. Grab the top of the boot.
Angelica grunts again
Mom: Alright if you don’t want to you can’t wear that boot. I’m teaching you how to put it on. It’s not my responsibility to put it on for you if I’m trying to teach you.
Angelica: I can’t.
Mom: You wanna wear it so let’s learn how to put it on.
Angelica: I need help.
Mom: Let’s start again, take it off. Nope,(as she tries to raise her foot so mom can take it off) hands.
Angelica: Ok, ok.
Mom: Pull, just keep pulling the boot. Hold on, hold on to this part here and pull it up towards you.
Angelica: Pull
Mom: Yeah.
Angelica: Pull, pull, pull.
Mom: Yeah, just pull the boot like if you’re trying to pull it all the way to your face. Pull up the boot. Pull up the boot.
Angelica grunting
Mom: Pull, pull, pull.
Angelica grunting aggressively
Mom: You’re al – you’re even closer, grab the top, grab the top, pull, pull, pull. Did you get it on?
Angelica: No.
Mom: Did you get the boot o- okay, stand up and see, is your foot all the way in? Umm, yeah you got it on by yourself. High-five!
Angelica: No.
Mom: Alright that’s fine.
Angelica: Thanks mom. Thanks for (i have no idea what she said here). See you in two days.
So lovelies, I’ll ask you again…
How do we create change?
Can theatre be used as a vehicle for social change?
How we engage with social injustices and inequalities with our kids is how we involve ourselves in the issues and work to resolve them. I follow a lot of parent related accounts on Instagram, both on the MFA and my personal feed. The big thing now is all the books and resources that exist (and let’s be honest they’re predominantly for white people but not entirely) to talk to their children about racial inequality and to just learn how to stop being racist. Let’s all just accept that Avenue Q had it right, “Everyone’s a little bit racist sometimes.” There are lots of people talking about how to not be racist and to learn about the oppression of others. I love that this is happening and there’s also a part of me that is sickened by the fact human decency towards all isn’t something we already know how to do. Why do we need all these books on how to do it? Why are we so scared to ask each other questions? Why are we so scared to just be decent to one another? Books and conversations are wonderful for engaging the flow of ideas and bringing awareness. But if we don’t do, if we don’t act with the knowledge we have, all the reading and talking didn’t affect change so it was pointless other than if made us feel for a short time we were fulfilling the image of being empathetic and supportive. To fight against oppression is active. To fight is a verb. Actors love verbs because that’s what our work calls for, for us to do something to reach our goal. To sit quietly is an active choice. To ignore is an active choice. To deny is an active choice. To support the continued oppression of a people is an active choice. We have to take a stand, we have to question what is the foundation of the types of humans we want to help raise in the world, how do we make change that benefits us all instead of just a few? These are the questions I’m asking myself so I can find the ways to engage in the fight for social change more than talking about them on a podcast, aligning myself with a political party and the activist groups that fall under that umbrella and just donating my money. Theatre is what I connect to and I feel gives us the most visceral experiential understanding of other people’s emotional life; it can create the deepest level of empathy. Maybe the way to support and expand the consciousness of ourselves and our communities is to participate in theatre designed to facilitate social change. Maybe I’ll go and get the drama therapy license one day. But until then I’ll continue to educate myself through books and dialogue work, sharing what I learn with my daughter and continuing to connect theatre to my social justice evolution. Revolution starts with our evolution so let’s all do the thing called evolving and elevate the consciousness of this world. God damn I sound so hippy, dippy, trippy. I would not have sounded a damn thing like this in my 20’s, lemme tell ya that right now. Getting close to 40 changes you. Having a child changes you.
A Short Story Before We Go
“I want to talk to you about life. It’s just too difficult to be alive, isn’t it, and try to function? There are all these people to deal with. I tried to buy a can of tuna fish” - is part of a monologue from Christopher Durang’s Laughing Wild. The woman’s experience in the supermarket leaves her distraught, crying, resorting to violence by hitting the man standing in front of the tuna fish cans screaming “Would you kindly move asshole?!” and then rushing out the store to hail a cab to the Metropolitan Museum of Art.
I myself have a tuna fish story. And I would like to share that with you now.
I went to the diner to pick up a pound of tuna fish for the office. Not that office, the one I worked at. As I approached the counter I was greeted by a super friendly middle aged Jewish woman with dark rimmed glasses and wavy ash blond hair swept back in a pony tail. She sounded like most people in Boca, like they emigrated from New York years ago and their accent wanted to make sure everyone knew this.
Our encounter proceeded as follows:
Me: Hi. Taisha, picking up the tuna.
Lady: Ok. (Handing me the bag) You don't look like a Taisha (she laughs)
Me: (while signing credit card) Oh yeah. What does a Taisha look like?
Lady: Well, you know, (in a whispered voice) it's a black person’s name.
Me: I am.
Lady: (look of shock) You are? Oh. I thought you were Spanish or something.
Me: I am.
Lady: (mind blown) You Are?
Me: Yeah, haha, I just get to be one of those lucky mixed people in the world who get to be both.
Lady: Wow. Well (again her voice lowers) you hear certain people's names and you expect to see…
Me: A certain face when they show up.
Lady: Yeah.
Me: Have a good day.
She then proceeded to talk to me about how she thought I ordered enough tuna for my group. I guess she didn't wanna leave things...awkward...
What continued to add to this awkward experience was the responses I got on Facebook. Now I don’t have a public account so it was all people I know responding, or you think you know – cause really how many of our so called Friends on that stupid app are really our friends? I fucking hate Facebook. Do we even know what a true friend is supposed to be anymore? But I digress from my story. The responses were full of a lot of “Wow’s” from my white family and friends. Do you Like that comment? Thanks for the wow, that would’ve been very helpful if you were standing right next to me. Seeing your level of empathy makes me feel validated as a human. And these wow’s were mostly followed up by some version of “you’re beautiful.” I’m not sure how to respond to a sincere praise on my physical appearance when someone thought they were in safe company with me to let their racial flag fly and ignorance show. Now my black friends and family came at me with things like, “you handled that fabulously” and “you’re Black??? Lmao.”
Our words have weight and affect people. That is why they are so powerful and tyrants across the globe do whatever they can to minimize the publics use of them freely. A lot of us have constipation of the brain and diarrhea of the mouth – boom, throwback dis from the 90’s, I probably haven’t said that in over twenty years. So, the thing with free speech is that we have to accept personal accountability. Words are weapons, words cause wars, words cause scars that will never heal, words create the image of who we are and how we see others. Maybe what we all need to learn is to take a breath and shut the hell up before we speak, especially when our words will harm or when we don’t have anything of significance to say, “wow.”
While my tuna fish experience was far less emotionally taxing and physically assaulting than the woman in Laughing Wild’s both examples show us that buying tuna fish is a lot more socially complicated than necessary and should, therefore, be avoided at all costs.
Raise A Glass Series
The Raise a Glass Series is a space for reflection and gratitude centered around the topic of the day and inspired by lyrics from Hamilton the Musical.
“History has its eyes on you.”
Well, tis Election time here in the States. It’s the most contentious time of the year. There’ll be screaming and crying, political lying for everyone to hear! It’s the most contentious time of the year.
But it happens so frequently, every four years to be exact, you’d think as a country we’d be better able to handle the voting process with dignity and grace. We’d have faith in our system, respect for and from our leaders and the process would go smoothly. Not everyone would be happy, no, that would be impossible. But we shit on this process all the time because we act like toddlers. Millions of people make the decision between two candidates (which that there alone is ass backwards, I mean we have more choices for BBQ sauce at the supermarket than for Presidential candidate…that just seems dumb). But you have a choice and how you choose reflects what you feel is important in this country. However, putting so much emphasis on what we think is important means we actively devalue the thinking of others – I’m not talking extremist hate groups cause that thinking must be eradicated – but being on opposite side of the aisle on political topics does not mean Thanksgiving should turn into an active war zone. These are the people you care about.
Finding common ground and working to create a more “perfect Union” is our goal as a country but it’s a work in progress. To make that happen we have to learn the skill of listening. That’s one of the number one skills an actor has to tap into for their work, doesn’t necessary mean we’re really good at that outside – but we use it a lot in our work. Listening doesn’t just happen with your ears. Today’s Daily Calm meditation on the Calm app, you know, the one I talk about like all the time, was on listening – hmm, like Divine Intervention here. And it talked about the use of the body to truly hear and understand someone. It is a full body experience taking in as much of the persons words, tone, facial expressions and body language as possible and then feeling their emotional energy. That’s how you can truly understand someone. Once we can do that we can begin to make significant changes to how we support one another.
Let’s raise a glass to strengthening our ability to listen and respecting each other with dignity and grace. I know that’s a tall order during Election time but if we keep that in mind while voting and being active participants in this country, we can make choices that don’t just benefit us but benefit our nation as a whole.
That’s all for today guys and dolls. Thank you so much for joining me again for another episode. As always, I hope this brings some joy into your day so your light can shine brighter.
Next week we’ll look at the world of improv and how the phrase “yes…and” can help us in our parenting.
If you are on Instagram so am I. You can find me @mfaparentingedition and give me a follow.
If you enjoyed this episode and want to show your support please spread a beautiful act of kindness by rating it if your listening on Apple podcasts and leaving a kind review if you feel so inclined, and telling at least one person about the show and that they can find it wherever they listen to their podcasts. And always, thank you to those who have rated the show and left a beautiful review – I appreciate you.
Again, thank you and I’ll see you on the other side
Mom: Angelica, can you say good-bye?
Angelica: Good-bye, good-bye.
Mom: Thank you.
Angelica: Thank you.
Mom: Angelica, can you say hello?
Angelica: Hello! Hello?
Mom: How are you today?
Angelica: I doing well…how are you?
Mom: Well I’m doing well also. (she laughs)
Welcome to MFA: The Parenting Edition, I’m Taisha Cameron. These lessons from the theatre for raising ourselves and our kids came about when I realized my MFA in acting trained me for life as a mommy better than life as a full-time actor. Today’s episode explores social justice and the value of a human life. We’ll explore some challenging questions, I’ll share some stories, and then we’ll end our episode with the Raise a Glass Series. So, without further ado, this is MFA.
“It’s just too difficult to be alive, isn’t it, and try to function? There are all these people to deal with.” ~ from Christopher Durang’s Laughing Wild
Episode Thirteen – It’s Socially Complicated
Question – How do we create change? Can theatre be used as a vehicle for social change? What are the social issues we feel are important and worth speaking out about? Why? What does the world look like that we long to live in? How does that world look, not only for our lives but, for those who are less fortunate than us? What does liberty, freedom, respect, equality, look like in your mind?
There are tons of plays out there that address social injustices and inequalities that people around the world face and I’ll leave a bunch of them in the show notes. But there’s, also, other branches of theatre that work most directly with those issues and the people directly affected by them.
Pedagogy
I’ll be honest, I had no idea what this word meant. Or that it was a word. I mean, I’m sure I came in contact with it at some point in my life but I clearly never took the time to learn what it meant. So, for those out there like me, our new word for today is pedagogy and I’m pronouncing it that way because that seems to be the most consistent pronunciation that I have found. It’s the method and practice of teaching. There is another term called critical pedagogy which is the philosophy of education and social movement. This concept originated with the educator Paulo Freire in Brazil during the 60’s. According to Wikipedia, “the goal of critical pedagogy is the emancipation of the oppressed through an awakening of the critical consciousness (which focuses on achieving an in-depth understanding of the world, allowing for the perception and exposure of social and political contradictions. Critical consciousness also includes taking action against the oppressive elements in one's life that are illuminated by that understanding).” Paulo Freire is the influence behind Augusto Boal’s Theatre of the Oppressed. Now we’ve slid to a new term, theatre pedagogy. Its root is connected with social awareness like critical pedagogy but utilizes the techniques of the theatre for this purpose. That is the foundation of Theatre of the Oppressed. I have not studied this form of theatre so what I’m throwing out to you is info I’ve gathered through the good old interweb. I’ll leave some links in the show notes as always for you to geek out on for research and inspiration. The simplest way to describe Theatre of the Oppressed is a creatively empowering space for individuals and communities to explore the oppressive forces most prevalent in their lives and practice ways they can come up with solutions on how to respond and react to those circumstances when encountered again in the outside world. It allows participants the opportunity to both create and practice executing constructive ways to resist oppression. Another form of this work is seen in drama therapy. Yes, drama therapy exists. After I finished my masters, I actually looked into going back to school (that would’ve been a dumb idea) but going back to school to get trained as a drama therapist. Obviously, I didn’t but I considered it. The following is from the North American Drama Therapy Association website,
Drama therapy is beneficial for individuals, families, and communities struggling with transition, loss, social stigmatization, isolation, and conflict. It is an effective option for the treatment and prevention of anxiety, depression, and addiction, among other conditions. Drama therapy can promote positive changes in mood, insight, and empathy, and it can facilitate healthy relationships.
Throughout this podcast, what I’ve been promoting is the use of theatre to help promote healthy changes in our lives. I feel like I’ve been a little drama therapist myself, but I’M NOT so don’t take anything that I said seriously because legally I am not giving you this information for direct therapeutic purposes…I’ve said that…so. Now, all of these methods help effect change in a person and community. In the world kids fall under the category of most vulnerable, with the least rights, and most susceptible to oppression and abuse from the nation their born into to their own parents.
Why do we have kids?
In episode one we talked choices. The choice to become parents and artists or whatever life we’ve chosen for ourselves. It basically was a look inward towards the truth of why we chose the path we’re on. This question is about our choice to expand society. What is the fundamental purpose for birthing another human? We’re approaching 8 billion people in the world. Why?
Ok, here, here in the US, we have a capitalist society so our purpose as citizens of this country is to keep the system going so, we’re born to be consumers. That’s the point of having kids as an American, that’s how we help our country and give to our country. The possibility of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness is there and should be our birthright but even that doesn’t extend to everyone. When you look at all the social issues that people of this country (and the world) fight for they all boil down to everyone wanting to be respected and not be oppressed. That’s the whole reason for the Declaration of Independence, which is when you think about it a really radical act – to emancipate yourself from another, to buck the system and get out from under the oppressive thumb of the British monarchy. And it worked. They, in my grossly oversimplified telling, wrote out their list of grievances and said “Fuck you! We’re done!” The feeling from these elite, educated, white men with money was a small sense of the oppression that women, the slaves they owned and others throughout history have felt and they said ‘No thank you, I’ll pass, we’re breaking up with you Britain cause you’re batshit crazy it’s definitely you and not me.’ Our society was founded on the desire to not be oppressed. Yet we still have battles about social issues that oppress the unalienable rights of our own people.
Now what are these issues?
What are the social issues that are on people’s minds? Well, we’re in an election year, so EVERYTHING seems to be of dire importance. Some heated topics for folks are Voting Rights, Climate Change, Healthcare, Immigration, Racial Injustice, Income Gap, Gun Violence, Hunger and Food Insecurity, Gender Inequality, Homelessness, Abortion, Education Laws, Labor Laws, and this is by no means the end of the list. I’m all for humanity operating from a place of authentic altruism but when it comes to voting and social justice issues are we really that concerned about others? Aren’t we all gonna vote to protect our own ass? Aren’t we all a little bit…selfish? Aren’t we all a little bit selfish sometimes? And that just helps those committing hate crimes. We teach our children the world is great but we also teach them it’s fine to hate, but things are fine if you’re rich and you’re white, this world if fucking crazy you know I’m right. Most of us don’t give a shit what happens to other people. We don’t. We say it’s not our problem, it sucks to be them. We judge or ridicule. We pray that we never end up like them (and we all have our on ideas of who the “them” refers to). Some people even wish others to die to rid the world of their existence, “and decrease the surplus population.” And a bah-humbug to you too. It makes me wonder than what is the value of a human life? Who gets to pursue happiness and who doesn’t? Who is allowed the freedom to live their authentic lives and who’s not afforded the freedom to live?
Children are the most vulnerable population on earth, right? I was reading the US Constitution because well, sometimes you have to do it for work (like a podcast episode you’re working on) and the beginning of it says (for those who’ve never read it):
We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, ensure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.
The part about secure the blessings of liberty to ourselves and our posterity made me think of the world my 3-year-old daughter is being raised in; how our actions and inactions will affect her and her children. There’s a mountain of social issues our country dabbles in addressing and I wonder if we’ll ever get to a place of making a successful lasting change in one or more of them.
*Angelica Interlude
Mom: Try it again
Angelica: (grunting) I need help…ing.
Mom: I have been helping you. Grab the top of the boot.
Angelica grunts again
Mom: Alright if you don’t want to you can’t wear that boot. I’m teaching you how to put it on. It’s not my responsibility to put it on for you if I’m trying to teach you.
Angelica: I can’t.
Mom: You wanna wear it so let’s learn how to put it on.
Angelica: I need help.
Mom: Let’s start again, take it off. Nope,(as she tries to raise her foot so mom can take it off) hands.
Angelica: Ok, ok.
Mom: Pull, just keep pulling the boot. Hold on, hold on to this part here and pull it up towards you.
Angelica: Pull
Mom: Yeah.
Angelica: Pull, pull, pull.
Mom: Yeah, just pull the boot like if you’re trying to pull it all the way to your face. Pull up the boot. Pull up the boot.
Angelica grunting
Mom: Pull, pull, pull.
Angelica grunting aggressively
Mom: You’re al – you’re even closer, grab the top, grab the top, pull, pull, pull. Did you get it on?
Angelica: No.
Mom: Did you get the boot o- okay, stand up and see, is your foot all the way in? Umm, yeah you got it on by yourself. High-five!
Angelica: No.
Mom: Alright that’s fine.
Angelica: Thanks mom. Thanks for (i have no idea what she said here). See you in two days.
So lovelies, I’ll ask you again…
How do we create change?
Can theatre be used as a vehicle for social change?
How we engage with social injustices and inequalities with our kids is how we involve ourselves in the issues and work to resolve them. I follow a lot of parent related accounts on Instagram, both on the MFA and my personal feed. The big thing now is all the books and resources that exist (and let’s be honest they’re predominantly for white people but not entirely) to talk to their children about racial inequality and to just learn how to stop being racist. Let’s all just accept that Avenue Q had it right, “Everyone’s a little bit racist sometimes.” There are lots of people talking about how to not be racist and to learn about the oppression of others. I love that this is happening and there’s also a part of me that is sickened by the fact human decency towards all isn’t something we already know how to do. Why do we need all these books on how to do it? Why are we so scared to ask each other questions? Why are we so scared to just be decent to one another? Books and conversations are wonderful for engaging the flow of ideas and bringing awareness. But if we don’t do, if we don’t act with the knowledge we have, all the reading and talking didn’t affect change so it was pointless other than if made us feel for a short time we were fulfilling the image of being empathetic and supportive. To fight against oppression is active. To fight is a verb. Actors love verbs because that’s what our work calls for, for us to do something to reach our goal. To sit quietly is an active choice. To ignore is an active choice. To deny is an active choice. To support the continued oppression of a people is an active choice. We have to take a stand, we have to question what is the foundation of the types of humans we want to help raise in the world, how do we make change that benefits us all instead of just a few? These are the questions I’m asking myself so I can find the ways to engage in the fight for social change more than talking about them on a podcast, aligning myself with a political party and the activist groups that fall under that umbrella and just donating my money. Theatre is what I connect to and I feel gives us the most visceral experiential understanding of other people’s emotional life; it can create the deepest level of empathy. Maybe the way to support and expand the consciousness of ourselves and our communities is to participate in theatre designed to facilitate social change. Maybe I’ll go and get the drama therapy license one day. But until then I’ll continue to educate myself through books and dialogue work, sharing what I learn with my daughter and continuing to connect theatre to my social justice evolution. Revolution starts with our evolution so let’s all do the thing called evolving and elevate the consciousness of this world. God damn I sound so hippy, dippy, trippy. I would not have sounded a damn thing like this in my 20’s, lemme tell ya that right now. Getting close to 40 changes you. Having a child changes you.
A Short Story Before We Go
“I want to talk to you about life. It’s just too difficult to be alive, isn’t it, and try to function? There are all these people to deal with. I tried to buy a can of tuna fish” - is part of a monologue from Christopher Durang’s Laughing Wild. The woman’s experience in the supermarket leaves her distraught, crying, resorting to violence by hitting the man standing in front of the tuna fish cans screaming “Would you kindly move asshole?!” and then rushing out the store to hail a cab to the Metropolitan Museum of Art.
I myself have a tuna fish story. And I would like to share that with you now.
I went to the diner to pick up a pound of tuna fish for the office. Not that office, the one I worked at. As I approached the counter I was greeted by a super friendly middle aged Jewish woman with dark rimmed glasses and wavy ash blond hair swept back in a pony tail. She sounded like most people in Boca, like they emigrated from New York years ago and their accent wanted to make sure everyone knew this.
Our encounter proceeded as follows:
Me: Hi. Taisha, picking up the tuna.
Lady: Ok. (Handing me the bag) You don't look like a Taisha (she laughs)
Me: (while signing credit card) Oh yeah. What does a Taisha look like?
Lady: Well, you know, (in a whispered voice) it's a black person’s name.
Me: I am.
Lady: (look of shock) You are? Oh. I thought you were Spanish or something.
Me: I am.
Lady: (mind blown) You Are?
Me: Yeah, haha, I just get to be one of those lucky mixed people in the world who get to be both.
Lady: Wow. Well (again her voice lowers) you hear certain people's names and you expect to see…
Me: A certain face when they show up.
Lady: Yeah.
Me: Have a good day.
She then proceeded to talk to me about how she thought I ordered enough tuna for my group. I guess she didn't wanna leave things...awkward...
What continued to add to this awkward experience was the responses I got on Facebook. Now I don’t have a public account so it was all people I know responding, or you think you know – cause really how many of our so called Friends on that stupid app are really our friends? I fucking hate Facebook. Do we even know what a true friend is supposed to be anymore? But I digress from my story. The responses were full of a lot of “Wow’s” from my white family and friends. Do you Like that comment? Thanks for the wow, that would’ve been very helpful if you were standing right next to me. Seeing your level of empathy makes me feel validated as a human. And these wow’s were mostly followed up by some version of “you’re beautiful.” I’m not sure how to respond to a sincere praise on my physical appearance when someone thought they were in safe company with me to let their racial flag fly and ignorance show. Now my black friends and family came at me with things like, “you handled that fabulously” and “you’re Black??? Lmao.”
Our words have weight and affect people. That is why they are so powerful and tyrants across the globe do whatever they can to minimize the publics use of them freely. A lot of us have constipation of the brain and diarrhea of the mouth – boom, throwback dis from the 90’s, I probably haven’t said that in over twenty years. So, the thing with free speech is that we have to accept personal accountability. Words are weapons, words cause wars, words cause scars that will never heal, words create the image of who we are and how we see others. Maybe what we all need to learn is to take a breath and shut the hell up before we speak, especially when our words will harm or when we don’t have anything of significance to say, “wow.”
While my tuna fish experience was far less emotionally taxing and physically assaulting than the woman in Laughing Wild’s both examples show us that buying tuna fish is a lot more socially complicated than necessary and should, therefore, be avoided at all costs.
Raise A Glass Series
The Raise a Glass Series is a space for reflection and gratitude centered around the topic of the day and inspired by lyrics from Hamilton the Musical.
“History has its eyes on you.”
Well, tis Election time here in the States. It’s the most contentious time of the year. There’ll be screaming and crying, political lying for everyone to hear! It’s the most contentious time of the year.
But it happens so frequently, every four years to be exact, you’d think as a country we’d be better able to handle the voting process with dignity and grace. We’d have faith in our system, respect for and from our leaders and the process would go smoothly. Not everyone would be happy, no, that would be impossible. But we shit on this process all the time because we act like toddlers. Millions of people make the decision between two candidates (which that there alone is ass backwards, I mean we have more choices for BBQ sauce at the supermarket than for Presidential candidate…that just seems dumb). But you have a choice and how you choose reflects what you feel is important in this country. However, putting so much emphasis on what we think is important means we actively devalue the thinking of others – I’m not talking extremist hate groups cause that thinking must be eradicated – but being on opposite side of the aisle on political topics does not mean Thanksgiving should turn into an active war zone. These are the people you care about.
Finding common ground and working to create a more “perfect Union” is our goal as a country but it’s a work in progress. To make that happen we have to learn the skill of listening. That’s one of the number one skills an actor has to tap into for their work, doesn’t necessary mean we’re really good at that outside – but we use it a lot in our work. Listening doesn’t just happen with your ears. Today’s Daily Calm meditation on the Calm app, you know, the one I talk about like all the time, was on listening – hmm, like Divine Intervention here. And it talked about the use of the body to truly hear and understand someone. It is a full body experience taking in as much of the persons words, tone, facial expressions and body language as possible and then feeling their emotional energy. That’s how you can truly understand someone. Once we can do that we can begin to make significant changes to how we support one another.
Let’s raise a glass to strengthening our ability to listen and respecting each other with dignity and grace. I know that’s a tall order during Election time but if we keep that in mind while voting and being active participants in this country, we can make choices that don’t just benefit us but benefit our nation as a whole.
That’s all for today guys and dolls. Thank you so much for joining me again for another episode. As always, I hope this brings some joy into your day so your light can shine brighter.
Next week we’ll look at the world of improv and how the phrase “yes…and” can help us in our parenting.
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Again, thank you and I’ll see you on the other side
Mom: Angelica, can you say good-bye?
Angelica: Good-bye, good-bye.
Mom: Thank you.
Angelica: Thank you.