Episode title: Mommy’s Freakin’ Awesome
Episode summary:
“What’s in a name?” Well, so much. Today we’ll be looking at the name of this show, the inspiration behind the podcast, why frankly my dear you should give a damn, and what to expect the rest of the season. These lessons from the theatre for raising ourselves and our kids is an inspiration and reminder to myself, and hopefully to you too, to remember the power you already have to be the parent of your dreams to the child of your dreams.
We’ll kick off our show with The Raise a Glass Series, get on to our questions to explore, and end with A Short Story Before We Go. MFA is the sometimes-musical, dramedy, in 3 acts, 1 intermission, the length of a sitcom designed to give mama’s (and any caregiver) a break in the day to breathe and reset along with a much-needed audio hug.
Act I: The Raise a Glass Series
Intermission: Angelica Interlude
~Empanadas
Act III: A Short Story Before We Go
The Great Family Update – what’s been going on with the fam during this super long hiatus the show has taken. Drama, trauma, and space for this mama.
Spread a Beautiful Act of Kindness:
Episode transcript: full transcript below
Sources that helped inspire this episode:
Connect with Me:
Support the Show: buy me a drink to say “hey, keep up the good work”, just go to www.buymeacoffee.com/mfaparenting
-------------------------------------------------
FULL TRANSCRIPT:
Mom: Angelica, can you say hello?
Angelica: Hello! Hello?
Mom: How are you today?
Angelica: I doing well…how are you?
Mom: Well, I’m doing well also. (she laughs)
Welcome to MFA the parenting edition. I'm your host, Taisha Cameron, a mom to a feisty, fiery, fierce, flailing, finicky little kid, and I'm a trained actor. These lessons from the theater for raising ourselves and our kids came about after the life altering revelation, I made that my MFA in acting trained me for life as a mommy, better than life as a full-time actor. We'll explore some challenging questions, I'll share some stories, and we'll kick things off with the Raise a Glass series. From the Method to mommy meltdowns and all the moments in between, welcome to MFA.
Quote: “what’s in a name? that which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.” Juliet in Romeo and Juliet
Episode 38 – Mommy’s Freakin’ Awesome
Well, hello darling!
If you’re tuning in for the first time, hello and welcome to the fam! For returning listeners I’m so honored to have you back here in this space. I’m sure you’ve noticed the new look and sound to the show. What’dya think? I was feeling the show needed a makeover or maybe I feel I need a makeover and I had one vicariously through the show. Either way I’ve been busy. I’ve taken a longer hiatus from the show than I originally intended, and I’ll share the story of the drama, trauma, and much needed space for this mama in the Short Story section later in the episode. Right now, let’s get back into the groove…get into the groove boy you’ve got to prove your love to me, yeah. Thank you Madonna.
Today we’ll be looking at the name of this show, the inspiration behind the podcast, why it’s worth your damn time, and what to expect the rest of the season.
Before we jump into that let’s kick things off with the Raise a Glass series. You don’t need to raise an actual glass…unless you got one in your hand already and if you do I say, HOLLA, let’s do this!
The Raise a Glass Series
The Raise a Glass Series is a space for reflection and gratitude centered around the topic of the day and inspired by lyrics from Hamilton the Musical.
“There's a million things I haven't done, But just you wait, What's your name, man? Alexander Hamilton!”
I’m sure we all have a long list of things we haven’t done yet but dream about or are actively working towards and they just haven’t reached the destination, yet.
Time is that precious commodity we waste all the damn…time. It is the only thing we are actually guaranteed as long as our bodies are alive. As long as you are breathing, you have time. So, the most important question is what we are going to do with the limited time we have. I feel like I’m at a point in my life where I am no longer living my life as if I have all the time in the world but working to be more mindful of how I spend the time I have. I want to leave a mark of positive, creative, loving, and fiery energy on the world before I go. I think I definitely left it with my daughter – I mean, she’s a force to be reckoned with. And I want to leave it with what I do and how I interact with people. That requires a lot of focus and a burning desire to be of service to something bigger than ourselves. This amount of responsibility has always been the thing I knew I was destined, as a human, to do but shied away from it because it required so much from me. It requires a lot from all of us – like everything – that’s why it’s so much easier to live life small, scared, safe, and squander our dreams on busyness or idleness (been there done that). It’s not about everyone becoming famous, rich, and achieving notoriety; that’s not everyone’s true honest to their soul dreams. But we all have a few daring dreams we wish we could make happen in our lives. The time is going to pass anyway until it doesn’t. Use your time to be the best human to humankind that you can be.
Let’s raise a glass to the million things we haven’t done yet but man just you wait! Keep dreaming and keep finding ways to make those million things a reality (so, it’s probably best to start with one at a time).
Question: Of all the name’s a show could be, why the hell did you settle on this one, Tai? Why should anyone give a damn about this little podcast?
Has this ever happened to you: your child does something ridiculous. Full stop. Am I right? But seriously, your child does something ridiculous or unacceptable in your eyes and as you are addressing them, in the way you have chosen, at the moment, to respond to their action or behavior, the orchestra of experts start tuning up their instruments in your head? The gaggle of parental controllers shows up in your thoughts and they all have comments on what you should or should not be doing,
You really need to be calm, kids need a good ass whooping but that’s not allowed anymore, you have to be strict and not let them get away with anything, it’s okay all kids test limits, don’t hit, don’t yell, always yell ya gotta scare them into behaving properly, if you wouldn’t want it done to you don’t do it to them, you see this is happening because you’ve been too soft on them, firm discipline, you can do this, you can’t do this, you’re gonna fuck them up for life, hope you’ve been saving for their therapy bills…and yours.
It’s easy to feel like you’re going crazy and going to have a breakdown at any given moment being a mama. And that’s when I happened to listen to the podcast that would spark this podcast.
I’ve said this in earlier episodes that listening to Janet Lansbury’s show “Unruffled” was the catalyst for creating MFA: The Parenting Edition. I had no idea she used to be an actor. And on her show about discipline one day, she made a comment that the way parents but on their stern face and change their voice to show ‘Oh I’m in charge now’ in order to discipline their child, is what her acting teacher would’ve called bad acting. And instead of laughing at myself for doing those things or questioning it, my response was “Oh she’s an actor?!” and I immediately started googling her. Now what that did for me was spark the idea, everything I needed to learn to raise my little munchkin I learned in grad school. See, I earned my Master of Fine Arts in Acting at The New School for Drama. There goes the MFA.
So, this show became my way of exploring what a Master of Fine Arts degree in Parenting would look like. Now why fine arts? Well, anyone who is a parent knows it’s not a science. The arts will teach us how to connect to a humans soul, their wants and desires, their motivations and inhibitions, what they love and detest, how to move them to tears and how to rebuild a broken heart. There is a reason why in college, the Arts & Humanities studies are all under the same umbrella-ella-ella-ay-ay-ay under my umbrella, oops I did it again, I broke into song while sharing my thoughts oh baby…alright, lemme stop. Umm, where was I…? I can keep this up all day ladies and gentlemen.
The arts. The arts help us communicate with each other at a deep human level to build relationships. That’s what acting is, the study and expression of how we are all in relationship with one another. The art and craft of what we do is to understand the core of our character and the world they live in so deeply that we can give the most honest portrayal of that human being’s story. So the audience can see themselves reflected back, or their partners and neighbors, or their children and hopefully resonate with a deeper level of understanding and compassion for them and themselves. An actor is someone who wants to understand why we do what we do and use their sense of play to communicate the human experience to others. Does this mean that all actors and artists make the best parents? Absolutely not. That would be ridiculous. For me, it’s just a way into my role as mom. A way in that gives me strength and empathy. A way that makes me feel empowered, decisive, and flexible. I was tired of feeling like I didn’t know what I was doing as a mom and the need to consult all the internet to find the right way. The theatre, arts, and creative play are my ways in. We all have our own way and I hope to create a space here where we can encourage our unique ways in so we feel more empowered on how to build stronger relationships with our children.
Let’s look more at what to expect from the show going forward after this.
Angelica Interlude
There is no absolute sure fire right way to be a parent. There never has been in the history of the world of parents and their never will be. And how exciting is that to know that so many have failed before you, fail now, and will fail after you – and it’s okay. It’s part of the work. And we can start over with a fresh mindset, perspective, and new set of tools at any time. Being in relationship with another is fluid. We fuck things up, we learn, we figure out new ways of connecting and communicating, we try again. That’s theatre my friends! It’s messy, it’s intimate, it’s exhilarating, it’s a cluster fuck, it’s depressing, it’s challenging, it’s life changing – it’s life!
In grad school my program focused on learning The Method. What I ended up learning by the time I graduated was the real method is, WHATEVER THE HELL METHODS WORK FOR YOU! And not all methods will work all the time, so you collect a bunch of tools in your toolbox and assess every situation to see what tools and choices are called for, ya take action, and then…go with God…or whatever you believe in.
I don’t know what the hell I’m doing all the time but, for my role as mom, I know where I would like the story of our lives to go and the type of mom I want to be along that road. And I also realize and accept that my role of mom is being shaped and changed and put in conflict with the roles of all the other people included in my family. Each partner and child are their own individuals with needs, wants, and desires dramatically different from my own.
So while MFA means a Master of Fine Arts it can easily, for this podcast mean:
What the hells with the name and why, frankly my dear, you should give a damn?
MFA: The Parenting Edition is a play off my Master of Fine Arts in Acting to jokingly mean a Master of Fine Arts in Parenting. There are experts and so-called experts everywhere – I am not one of them. I am a mom with too many damn questions and an intense desire to feel confident in myself without constantly feeling the need to consult the peanut gallery every time I make a decision about my damn child. I want to feel empowered and I want other mama’s and papa’s to feel empowered. I needed a space and a way of feeling more at peace and confident, so I birthed this podcast into existence to be that space. There was so much advice and information in my head from all the books, blogs, podcasts, and two cents on social media, I was becoming paralyzed to take action. Constantly searching for the “right” way was making me a stressed out mama and Angelica, my daughter, was getting the brunt of that stress. These lessons from the theatre for raising ourselves and our kids is an inspiration and reminder to myself, and hopefully to you too, to remember the power you already have to be the parent of your dreams to the child of your dreams.
An actor needs to grow their toolbox of skills but what they use every time they dive into a new role is themselves – their experiences, their questions, their beliefs, their love and all their pain. They choose what is helpful and put the rest to the side to help sculpt the relationships and world of the play that the story needs. You know what life you want to live, you know the relationships you want to have with your children and your family members; search the tools you already have within yourself first and then seek out the tools from others that can be of benefit and toss the rest either in your toolbox for later or in the garbage. Most of what you need to be the parent of your dreams may already be in you and you just haven’t believed it’s enough, yet.
Join me bi-weekly as I share tools, pass on stories and lessons from my training as I see them connecting to the role of being a parent, and ask a million questions on ways to find our voice, step into our power, trust ourselves, and take a fucking break to breathe and reset on our quest to grow and evolve into the best parent our child needs in their life. We were meant to enjoy our time with our kids so let’s fucking do it.
A Short Story Before We Go
The plan was never to take the entire summer off. It was to take a month, which I adjusted to two, then needed to move to well, where we are now. Drained, exhausted, burnt out.
This show that had begun in such a happy place, full of excitement and energizing joy, was now becoming a draining chore that I was muscling through because I felt obligated to complete what I started. I was consulting too many experts on how to build a podcast, build a brand, market your business, use social media effectively, and build your audience.
I was shackling myself to these plans, tactics and ideas that were not serving me.
All that was happening in me working to show up consistently in a very aggressive manner was anger, fatigue, and resentment. So I took an entire month off from creating or producing. I didn't make plans for it. I didn't think about it too much, any more than to tell somebody "yeah, I'll get back to it." I just straight up ghosted from podcasting, my website, and posting on Instagram. Take a break was the model for most of the summer.
Then it was time to get back to work. Once I started planning and prepping for the season a lot of shit started to go down in my family, as things go when you’re getting ready to start something new. There were a lot of COVID related illnesses in my extended family, which was a bit scary, which then turned tragic when my husband's grandmother, the lovely Selma Blattman one of the most graceful and kind women the world has ever known, recently passed from the virus. So, of course, as Murphy's law would have it, in the middle of all this illness so close to home tragedy stuck too close when Angelica, then ended up in the ER for emergency shunt surgery.
We are beyond grateful and couldn't have asked for a better team to be taking care of our munchkin than with the Joe DiMaggio Children's Hospital Neurosurgery team. Angelica is spunky as hell and her feisty nature is what helps her get through the hand she's been dealt in life. I try to take my lead from her on how best to advocate for her needs. And she teaches me every day to be a more compassionate, patient, understanding, and flexible human being. And boy does she have her work cut out for her. I miss the mark a million times but she hasn’t given up faith in me so I’ll keep striving to know better and do better.
Speaking of doing better, she's doing great! That kid bounced back faster than I imagined she would, but that just goes to show the resilience of children.
That’s all for today guys and dolls. Thank you so much for joining me on this bonus kick off episode to season 3 about the name of the show and what we have in store moving forward. So that's a bit of an update on where we are and why I'm so excited to be back here, podcasting again, and connecting with you to talk about the moments in our life that shape who we are.
Next week you and I will embark on a journey to uncover our history. We’ll look at the importance of understanding the history, of how we were raised.
A little reminder: in the show notes you will find links to the 2 best ways to reach me along with a link to more details and a full transcript of this episode that you can share with a friend who may enjoy this show but is hearing impaired or just hasn’t gotten into listening to podcasts yet and prefers to read. The show notes will always give you direct links to all the things I mention.
If you enjoyed this episode and want to show your support, please spread a beautiful act of kindness by sharing the show with a friend who you think would enjoy it and also send me a little message telling me a little about you.
One last thing before we go – here’s my audio hug to you so you can breath, reset, and kick some ass today (but don’t literally kick anyone’s ass, that’s called assault): here’s my special hug for you, to paint your spirit a brighter hue, so catch this hug and hold it tight, go walk in grace and shine your light.
Thanks again and I’ll see you on the other side.
Mom: Angelica, can you say good-bye?
Angelica: Good-bye, good-bye.
Mom: Thank you.
Angelica: Thank you.
Episode summary:
“What’s in a name?” Well, so much. Today we’ll be looking at the name of this show, the inspiration behind the podcast, why frankly my dear you should give a damn, and what to expect the rest of the season. These lessons from the theatre for raising ourselves and our kids is an inspiration and reminder to myself, and hopefully to you too, to remember the power you already have to be the parent of your dreams to the child of your dreams.
We’ll kick off our show with The Raise a Glass Series, get on to our questions to explore, and end with A Short Story Before We Go. MFA is the sometimes-musical, dramedy, in 3 acts, 1 intermission, the length of a sitcom designed to give mama’s (and any caregiver) a break in the day to breathe and reset along with a much-needed audio hug.
Act I: The Raise a Glass Series
- The Raise a Glass Series is a space for reflection and gratitude centered around the topic of the day and inspired by lyrics from Hamilton the Musical.
- Of all the name’s a show could be called, why the hell did you settle on this one, Tai?
- Why should anyone give a damn about this little podcast?
Intermission: Angelica Interlude
~Empanadas
Act III: A Short Story Before We Go
The Great Family Update – what’s been going on with the fam during this super long hiatus the show has taken. Drama, trauma, and space for this mama.
Spread a Beautiful Act of Kindness:
- Tell one person you know you enjoy this podcast and where to find it
- Wherever they listen to their podcasts
- Listen on the website mfaparentingedition.com/038 to read the transcript for those who are hearing impaired or English is a second language
Episode transcript: full transcript below
Sources that helped inspire this episode:
- Unruffled
- Get Into the Groove video
- Rihanna - Umbrella (Orange Version) (Official Music Video) ft. JAY-Z - YouTube
- Britney Spears - Oops!...I Did It Again (Official HD Video) - YouTube
- Frankly My Dear, I Don't Give a Damn - Gone with the Wind (6/6) Movie CLIP (1939) HD - YouTube
Connect with Me:
- Best way - [email protected]
- IG - @mfaparentingedition
- Send me an email or DM on IG to say hello and tell me
- one fun thing about your life journey
- if you were stranded on an island and could be with the members of one boy band would it be the gentlemen of NSYNC, Backstreet Boys, or New Kids on the Block and yes you’d have to be with all of them you couldn’t pick Donnie, AJ, and Justin and leave the rest
Support the Show: buy me a drink to say “hey, keep up the good work”, just go to www.buymeacoffee.com/mfaparenting
-------------------------------------------------
FULL TRANSCRIPT:
Mom: Angelica, can you say hello?
Angelica: Hello! Hello?
Mom: How are you today?
Angelica: I doing well…how are you?
Mom: Well, I’m doing well also. (she laughs)
Welcome to MFA the parenting edition. I'm your host, Taisha Cameron, a mom to a feisty, fiery, fierce, flailing, finicky little kid, and I'm a trained actor. These lessons from the theater for raising ourselves and our kids came about after the life altering revelation, I made that my MFA in acting trained me for life as a mommy, better than life as a full-time actor. We'll explore some challenging questions, I'll share some stories, and we'll kick things off with the Raise a Glass series. From the Method to mommy meltdowns and all the moments in between, welcome to MFA.
Quote: “what’s in a name? that which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.” Juliet in Romeo and Juliet
Episode 38 – Mommy’s Freakin’ Awesome
Well, hello darling!
If you’re tuning in for the first time, hello and welcome to the fam! For returning listeners I’m so honored to have you back here in this space. I’m sure you’ve noticed the new look and sound to the show. What’dya think? I was feeling the show needed a makeover or maybe I feel I need a makeover and I had one vicariously through the show. Either way I’ve been busy. I’ve taken a longer hiatus from the show than I originally intended, and I’ll share the story of the drama, trauma, and much needed space for this mama in the Short Story section later in the episode. Right now, let’s get back into the groove…get into the groove boy you’ve got to prove your love to me, yeah. Thank you Madonna.
Today we’ll be looking at the name of this show, the inspiration behind the podcast, why it’s worth your damn time, and what to expect the rest of the season.
Before we jump into that let’s kick things off with the Raise a Glass series. You don’t need to raise an actual glass…unless you got one in your hand already and if you do I say, HOLLA, let’s do this!
The Raise a Glass Series
The Raise a Glass Series is a space for reflection and gratitude centered around the topic of the day and inspired by lyrics from Hamilton the Musical.
“There's a million things I haven't done, But just you wait, What's your name, man? Alexander Hamilton!”
I’m sure we all have a long list of things we haven’t done yet but dream about or are actively working towards and they just haven’t reached the destination, yet.
Time is that precious commodity we waste all the damn…time. It is the only thing we are actually guaranteed as long as our bodies are alive. As long as you are breathing, you have time. So, the most important question is what we are going to do with the limited time we have. I feel like I’m at a point in my life where I am no longer living my life as if I have all the time in the world but working to be more mindful of how I spend the time I have. I want to leave a mark of positive, creative, loving, and fiery energy on the world before I go. I think I definitely left it with my daughter – I mean, she’s a force to be reckoned with. And I want to leave it with what I do and how I interact with people. That requires a lot of focus and a burning desire to be of service to something bigger than ourselves. This amount of responsibility has always been the thing I knew I was destined, as a human, to do but shied away from it because it required so much from me. It requires a lot from all of us – like everything – that’s why it’s so much easier to live life small, scared, safe, and squander our dreams on busyness or idleness (been there done that). It’s not about everyone becoming famous, rich, and achieving notoriety; that’s not everyone’s true honest to their soul dreams. But we all have a few daring dreams we wish we could make happen in our lives. The time is going to pass anyway until it doesn’t. Use your time to be the best human to humankind that you can be.
Let’s raise a glass to the million things we haven’t done yet but man just you wait! Keep dreaming and keep finding ways to make those million things a reality (so, it’s probably best to start with one at a time).
Question: Of all the name’s a show could be, why the hell did you settle on this one, Tai? Why should anyone give a damn about this little podcast?
Has this ever happened to you: your child does something ridiculous. Full stop. Am I right? But seriously, your child does something ridiculous or unacceptable in your eyes and as you are addressing them, in the way you have chosen, at the moment, to respond to their action or behavior, the orchestra of experts start tuning up their instruments in your head? The gaggle of parental controllers shows up in your thoughts and they all have comments on what you should or should not be doing,
You really need to be calm, kids need a good ass whooping but that’s not allowed anymore, you have to be strict and not let them get away with anything, it’s okay all kids test limits, don’t hit, don’t yell, always yell ya gotta scare them into behaving properly, if you wouldn’t want it done to you don’t do it to them, you see this is happening because you’ve been too soft on them, firm discipline, you can do this, you can’t do this, you’re gonna fuck them up for life, hope you’ve been saving for their therapy bills…and yours.
It’s easy to feel like you’re going crazy and going to have a breakdown at any given moment being a mama. And that’s when I happened to listen to the podcast that would spark this podcast.
I’ve said this in earlier episodes that listening to Janet Lansbury’s show “Unruffled” was the catalyst for creating MFA: The Parenting Edition. I had no idea she used to be an actor. And on her show about discipline one day, she made a comment that the way parents but on their stern face and change their voice to show ‘Oh I’m in charge now’ in order to discipline their child, is what her acting teacher would’ve called bad acting. And instead of laughing at myself for doing those things or questioning it, my response was “Oh she’s an actor?!” and I immediately started googling her. Now what that did for me was spark the idea, everything I needed to learn to raise my little munchkin I learned in grad school. See, I earned my Master of Fine Arts in Acting at The New School for Drama. There goes the MFA.
So, this show became my way of exploring what a Master of Fine Arts degree in Parenting would look like. Now why fine arts? Well, anyone who is a parent knows it’s not a science. The arts will teach us how to connect to a humans soul, their wants and desires, their motivations and inhibitions, what they love and detest, how to move them to tears and how to rebuild a broken heart. There is a reason why in college, the Arts & Humanities studies are all under the same umbrella-ella-ella-ay-ay-ay under my umbrella, oops I did it again, I broke into song while sharing my thoughts oh baby…alright, lemme stop. Umm, where was I…? I can keep this up all day ladies and gentlemen.
The arts. The arts help us communicate with each other at a deep human level to build relationships. That’s what acting is, the study and expression of how we are all in relationship with one another. The art and craft of what we do is to understand the core of our character and the world they live in so deeply that we can give the most honest portrayal of that human being’s story. So the audience can see themselves reflected back, or their partners and neighbors, or their children and hopefully resonate with a deeper level of understanding and compassion for them and themselves. An actor is someone who wants to understand why we do what we do and use their sense of play to communicate the human experience to others. Does this mean that all actors and artists make the best parents? Absolutely not. That would be ridiculous. For me, it’s just a way into my role as mom. A way in that gives me strength and empathy. A way that makes me feel empowered, decisive, and flexible. I was tired of feeling like I didn’t know what I was doing as a mom and the need to consult all the internet to find the right way. The theatre, arts, and creative play are my ways in. We all have our own way and I hope to create a space here where we can encourage our unique ways in so we feel more empowered on how to build stronger relationships with our children.
Let’s look more at what to expect from the show going forward after this.
Angelica Interlude
There is no absolute sure fire right way to be a parent. There never has been in the history of the world of parents and their never will be. And how exciting is that to know that so many have failed before you, fail now, and will fail after you – and it’s okay. It’s part of the work. And we can start over with a fresh mindset, perspective, and new set of tools at any time. Being in relationship with another is fluid. We fuck things up, we learn, we figure out new ways of connecting and communicating, we try again. That’s theatre my friends! It’s messy, it’s intimate, it’s exhilarating, it’s a cluster fuck, it’s depressing, it’s challenging, it’s life changing – it’s life!
In grad school my program focused on learning The Method. What I ended up learning by the time I graduated was the real method is, WHATEVER THE HELL METHODS WORK FOR YOU! And not all methods will work all the time, so you collect a bunch of tools in your toolbox and assess every situation to see what tools and choices are called for, ya take action, and then…go with God…or whatever you believe in.
I don’t know what the hell I’m doing all the time but, for my role as mom, I know where I would like the story of our lives to go and the type of mom I want to be along that road. And I also realize and accept that my role of mom is being shaped and changed and put in conflict with the roles of all the other people included in my family. Each partner and child are their own individuals with needs, wants, and desires dramatically different from my own.
So while MFA means a Master of Fine Arts it can easily, for this podcast mean:
- Master of Feeling Arts
- Mutha Fuckin’ Actor
- Mommy’s Freakin Awesome
- Mastering Feelings Authentically
- My Freedom Adventure – this one is super exciting to me because it is an aspect of the show I really want to play up more. Like encouraging parents to recognize and utilize:
- You probably already have tools in your pocket that can help you be the amazing parent you want to and don’t trust that you are…yet!
- You probably just need to sit and think a little creatively about the life journey you’ve been on and how those tools you’ve collected along the way can aide you in building a stronger relationship with your child or children.
- You don’t have to give away all your parental power to the experts who are making bank off the insecurities of parents these days. Many figured this out without parenting experts before. Connecting deeply with your child is the key to all the answers and no expert can do that work for you – you walk that path with your little munchkins alone.
- You have to let go of a lot of your old thinking and mindsets to have the space to be in true communion with another human being and have a solid relationship with them – how challenging but freeing it will feel to go on this mental, emotional, and spiritual journey for personal freedom while taking on the role of parent.
What the hells with the name and why, frankly my dear, you should give a damn?
MFA: The Parenting Edition is a play off my Master of Fine Arts in Acting to jokingly mean a Master of Fine Arts in Parenting. There are experts and so-called experts everywhere – I am not one of them. I am a mom with too many damn questions and an intense desire to feel confident in myself without constantly feeling the need to consult the peanut gallery every time I make a decision about my damn child. I want to feel empowered and I want other mama’s and papa’s to feel empowered. I needed a space and a way of feeling more at peace and confident, so I birthed this podcast into existence to be that space. There was so much advice and information in my head from all the books, blogs, podcasts, and two cents on social media, I was becoming paralyzed to take action. Constantly searching for the “right” way was making me a stressed out mama and Angelica, my daughter, was getting the brunt of that stress. These lessons from the theatre for raising ourselves and our kids is an inspiration and reminder to myself, and hopefully to you too, to remember the power you already have to be the parent of your dreams to the child of your dreams.
An actor needs to grow their toolbox of skills but what they use every time they dive into a new role is themselves – their experiences, their questions, their beliefs, their love and all their pain. They choose what is helpful and put the rest to the side to help sculpt the relationships and world of the play that the story needs. You know what life you want to live, you know the relationships you want to have with your children and your family members; search the tools you already have within yourself first and then seek out the tools from others that can be of benefit and toss the rest either in your toolbox for later or in the garbage. Most of what you need to be the parent of your dreams may already be in you and you just haven’t believed it’s enough, yet.
Join me bi-weekly as I share tools, pass on stories and lessons from my training as I see them connecting to the role of being a parent, and ask a million questions on ways to find our voice, step into our power, trust ourselves, and take a fucking break to breathe and reset on our quest to grow and evolve into the best parent our child needs in their life. We were meant to enjoy our time with our kids so let’s fucking do it.
A Short Story Before We Go
The plan was never to take the entire summer off. It was to take a month, which I adjusted to two, then needed to move to well, where we are now. Drained, exhausted, burnt out.
This show that had begun in such a happy place, full of excitement and energizing joy, was now becoming a draining chore that I was muscling through because I felt obligated to complete what I started. I was consulting too many experts on how to build a podcast, build a brand, market your business, use social media effectively, and build your audience.
I was shackling myself to these plans, tactics and ideas that were not serving me.
All that was happening in me working to show up consistently in a very aggressive manner was anger, fatigue, and resentment. So I took an entire month off from creating or producing. I didn't make plans for it. I didn't think about it too much, any more than to tell somebody "yeah, I'll get back to it." I just straight up ghosted from podcasting, my website, and posting on Instagram. Take a break was the model for most of the summer.
Then it was time to get back to work. Once I started planning and prepping for the season a lot of shit started to go down in my family, as things go when you’re getting ready to start something new. There were a lot of COVID related illnesses in my extended family, which was a bit scary, which then turned tragic when my husband's grandmother, the lovely Selma Blattman one of the most graceful and kind women the world has ever known, recently passed from the virus. So, of course, as Murphy's law would have it, in the middle of all this illness so close to home tragedy stuck too close when Angelica, then ended up in the ER for emergency shunt surgery.
We are beyond grateful and couldn't have asked for a better team to be taking care of our munchkin than with the Joe DiMaggio Children's Hospital Neurosurgery team. Angelica is spunky as hell and her feisty nature is what helps her get through the hand she's been dealt in life. I try to take my lead from her on how best to advocate for her needs. And she teaches me every day to be a more compassionate, patient, understanding, and flexible human being. And boy does she have her work cut out for her. I miss the mark a million times but she hasn’t given up faith in me so I’ll keep striving to know better and do better.
Speaking of doing better, she's doing great! That kid bounced back faster than I imagined she would, but that just goes to show the resilience of children.
That’s all for today guys and dolls. Thank you so much for joining me on this bonus kick off episode to season 3 about the name of the show and what we have in store moving forward. So that's a bit of an update on where we are and why I'm so excited to be back here, podcasting again, and connecting with you to talk about the moments in our life that shape who we are.
Next week you and I will embark on a journey to uncover our history. We’ll look at the importance of understanding the history, of how we were raised.
A little reminder: in the show notes you will find links to the 2 best ways to reach me along with a link to more details and a full transcript of this episode that you can share with a friend who may enjoy this show but is hearing impaired or just hasn’t gotten into listening to podcasts yet and prefers to read. The show notes will always give you direct links to all the things I mention.
If you enjoyed this episode and want to show your support, please spread a beautiful act of kindness by sharing the show with a friend who you think would enjoy it and also send me a little message telling me a little about you.
One last thing before we go – here’s my audio hug to you so you can breath, reset, and kick some ass today (but don’t literally kick anyone’s ass, that’s called assault): here’s my special hug for you, to paint your spirit a brighter hue, so catch this hug and hold it tight, go walk in grace and shine your light.
Thanks again and I’ll see you on the other side.
Mom: Angelica, can you say good-bye?
Angelica: Good-bye, good-bye.
Mom: Thank you.
Angelica: Thank you.